Sometimes I don’t like the skin I’m in!

 

No matter who you are, where you came from or how many followers you have on social media every girl feels a little bit shit about themselves at least once every single day, even the most talked about celebs! I hate caring so much about the way I look but theres so much pressure on us all to look a certain way its tough not too, sometimes a little overbearing! If its not my makeup free face its my mum tum, my stretch marks, my messy hair or something else I’ve learnt to dislike about myself that gets me down.

See on the outside people assume I’m this really confident person, that I’m really sure about myself and the way that I look, I’m complimented on being a really glamorous mum which is lovely but they couldn’t be any more wrong! I fight with myself every single day over the way I look, I put my makeup on and instantly I feel better, feel more myself but then I notice little things like my nose and how much I hate it, or my peach fuzz facial hair that I need to bleach because naturally its darker than I’d like it to be!

Writing this I can hear how superficial it sounds but its a feeling I can’t seem to shift, so much so that it can effect my mood from time to time and I know I shouldn’t let it! I know I shouldn’t be bothered about the things I can’t change but I am, I feel inadequate sometimes but at other times I’m bursting at the seams with all this girl power and self love talk that I couldn’t care any less about how I look!

My weight has always fluctuated and since having kids its been at its worst. My body is certainly not the same as it once was and for the past 5 years I’ve been trying to learn to love it again. I’ve become really critical and analytical of myself, some days I can’t even bare to look at my body in the mirror, in fact I’d rather avoid it most of the time! I long to be one of those confident girls bossing the self love agenda, teaching everyone how to love themselves for who they are, its important, we really should love the skin we’re in! Realistically though I don’t always love myself, 50% of the time I do but the other 50% of the time I don’t.

I don’t like the skin I’m in –

  • When I wake up with no makeup on and puffy eyes
  • When I take my clothes off to jump in the shower
  • When I’m doing my makeup and notice all of my imperfections, lines and wrinkles
  • When I’m sitting down trying to disguise my tummy rolls
  • When I accidentally open the front camera on my phone
  • When I’m tagged in a really unflattering photo on my socials
  • When I compare myself to celebs that clearly alter their bodies
  • When I eat bad for you foods or indulge and over eat
  • When I look at myself for too long in the mirror
  • When I’m on my period and I’m bloated as hell
  • When I’m tired and have visible bags under my eyes
  • When I haven’t found the time to shave my legs
  • When people stare & I start wondering whats wrong with me

The list could probably go on. The thing is I don’t go out of my way to feel the way I do, sometimes I’ll feel fine in these situations, other times I don’t but I know I’m not alone. We all struggle with feeling a little less than adequate sometimes and we can all be a little too hard on ourselves too. I’ve always very much been a ‘its the soul that matters’ kind of girl, I’m much more interested in peoples personalities and who they are than what you seen on the outside, but not when it comes to myself. I’m cruel to myself, I say things to myself that I’d never dream of saying to anyone else which indicates that I should probably stop treating myself that way. I’m on my journey to finding self love, to be in a place where I feel confident in my skin 90% of the time at least. Heres to hoping I’ll get there eventually!

xox

26 Comments

  1. The Sunday Mode April 10, 2017 / 1:33 pm

    I feel the same way and it’s something I’m actively trying to change. I’ve noticed that I am very nice to other people but very cruel in what I say to myself so lately I’ve been doing this thing where every time I catch my reflection in the mirror or something I say a kind thing to myself. It sounds lame, but I’m hoping it’ll get me on track to more positive thinking.

    Julia // The Sunday Mode

    • francescaferrarinelson@yahoo.co.uk April 10, 2017 / 2:03 pm

      Yes I’m exactly the same! That sounds like a great place to start with learning to self love I’ll have to start!

  2. Lola April 10, 2017 / 2:05 pm

    wow what a great honest read. i think the comfort you can find in yourself is the fact that the majority of women and girls feel this way. its not right but all the social norms and societal expectations have a massive impact on how we feel about this! x
    Lola Mia // http://www.lolitabonita.co.uk

    • francescaferrarinelson@yahoo.co.uk April 10, 2017 / 3:01 pm

      They certainly do and its a shame there is so much pressure! Glad you enjoyed this!

  3. last year's girl April 10, 2017 / 2:18 pm

    I think being honest about it is the first step in learning to love yourself. That list you wrote of all the things you perceive as flaws? Try reading it back to yourself in a silly voice, and see how ridiculous it sounds. I don’t know you, but any body that has produced two beautiful boys is a bloody marvel that deserves to be celebrated.

    And, if all else fails, that comment above about finding something good to say to yourself every time you look in the mirror is a good place to start.

    Lis / last year’s girl (via UK Bloggers) x

    • francescaferrarinelson@yahoo.co.uk April 10, 2017 / 3:03 pm

      Awwh lovely lovely comment thank you!! I totally get how silly they all sound most of the time I wonder why I’m being so picky and silly!

  4. Milly Youngman April 10, 2017 / 2:35 pm

    I’ve definitely experienced this – I suffer with roseacea and some mornings I wake up with a bright red face, plus bags under my eyes and a surprise spot on my chin. THANKS FACE. It’s great to know it’s common to feel this way about your skin, and I’m not alone!

    • francescaferrarinelson@yahoo.co.uk April 10, 2017 / 3:03 pm

      Right? and thats why I wanted to be honest about it on here!! xox

  5. Sophie April 10, 2017 / 10:00 pm

    I love this post and I love your honesty. You have made me feel less alone knowing others go through this also. I also instantly feel better once putting my makeup on, but even then I still point out my imperfections. I compare myself to others also which doesn’t make me feel much better.. it’s just a never ending, vicious cycle.

    Thank you for posting this <3 xoxo

    • francescaferrarinelson@yahoo.co.uk April 11, 2017 / 10:29 am

      Awwh Sophie I’m so glad you loved this read and that you could relate!! Thats my intention I want everyone who feels the same to know they aren’t alone and its a real struggle for so many!! We’ll get to a place of self love eventually!

  6. Sarah April 10, 2017 / 10:07 pm

    Oh lovely. Don’t worry it’s not just you. I feel EXACTLY the same to every statement on that list. xx

    • francescaferrarinelson@yahoo.co.uk April 11, 2017 / 10:30 am

      Its a shame that we can be so cruel to ourselves isn’t it!

  7. Jessica | growchangeaccept April 11, 2017 / 8:44 am

    I love love love this post! So honest and raw, it’s just so real and girl I feel you!! You are most defo a yummy mummy and you should embrace what you have because of it you have two beautiful babies!! I know it’s easier said than done but you will get there one day and hopefully sooner than you think!

    PS I LOVE YOUR NEW HEADER!!

    Jessica | growchangeaccept.co.uk

    • francescaferrarinelson@yahoo.co.uk April 11, 2017 / 10:33 am

      Awwwh yaaay means so much that people are loving this post and are able to relate!! Honestly I don’t know where it all came from I just had to write it down it was one of those days! Even though having the boys changed my body I’d never go back I love that I have them and my body changed for such a good reason its just hard to see it sometimes but eventually I’ll get there! 😀 Ahhh I love it too thank you!! xoxo

  8. Jenni April 11, 2017 / 10:02 am

    I’ve been feeling pretty crap recently too about how I look. I’ve put on some weight and I just feel huge. But the worse I feel I just eat more chocolate. I have decided I am rejoining slimming world next week though to take action

    • francescaferrarinelson@yahoo.co.uk April 11, 2017 / 10:34 am

      Ahhh I know that struggle I do it all the time and am filled with instant regret!!! I’ve started being healthier now and signed up to the gym otherwise for me I know It’ll be an endless cycle of feeling crap about myself!

  9. Crystal April 11, 2017 / 2:24 pm

    I love this honest post. I think at one point or another we can all relate to not liking the skin we are in or the body we are in. Great post!

    • francescaferrarinelson@yahoo.co.uk April 11, 2017 / 3:01 pm

      Really glad you enjoyed the read!! xox

  10. Hayley Warren April 11, 2017 / 8:48 pm

    I’ve only recently started to feel more comfortable with the way I look without makeup. I can really relate to this post a lot!

    • francescaferrarinelson@yahoo.co.uk April 12, 2017 / 10:38 am

      Gosh I wish I did I just hate the way my face looks without it probably because everyone says I look ill when I have no makeup on!!

  11. denajayne April 12, 2017 / 7:20 pm

    I often feel rubbish in my skin, even more so recently. Made me feel rubbish when I was sent home from work as I had no makeup on, people said I looked terrible!! Was gutted xo

    • francescaferrarinelson@yahoo.co.uk April 12, 2017 / 7:53 pm

      oh my god!! Sorry to hear about that!! I get told I look really ill and pale with no makeup on its so rude!

  12. Angela Kate Webster | Cosmic Kick April 13, 2017 / 12:58 am

    I feel you. I’ve felt this way for years, but lately I’ve started meditating again and honestly, it’s helping with my self image issues. I’m not a very spiritual person at all, but I think just taking time to clear my head of negative chatter is helping 🙂

    • francescaferrarinelson@yahoo.co.uk April 14, 2017 / 9:35 am

      Meditation is a game changer!! It really helps to clear the mind and be in a really calming peaceful place!! You don’t have be spiritual to meditate and thats the beauty of it!

  13. Lindsey April 16, 2017 / 12:19 pm

    You are not alone on this, alot of us women and men too feel, that way. but what you have to try and remember, easier said than done I know, is that you have people around you, that loev you. x

    • francescaferrarinelson@yahoo.co.uk April 16, 2017 / 5:58 pm

      Thats true, its nice to know but sometimes even that isn’t enough to make me believe otherwise!

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