This morning I was up at 5.40am with both boys wide awake shouting for me, now I don’t know about you but I have to adjust when waking up, I’m not a spring chicken straight away! So my eldest gathered some toys ready to bring into my bed, I hopped over and got the youngest out of his cot and popped him down on the bed whilst I laid there trying to gather any ounce of energy within me. At this point I have kids climbing over me, the youngest is hitting me repeatedly with a hard toy whilst giving me the very cute and innocent smile he always gives me (this is so I forget what a lunatic he can be)! Then the hair pulling begins, in a bid to save myself I jump up trying to act alive and snappy, only to be greeted by a very foul smelling nappy that I immediately need to change. Whilst changing his poo butt I’m fighting with him as he tries to roll over and escape, and when all else fails he reaches for his bits! (A nappy change is not as easy as it seems!) Whilst this is going on my eldest is collecting things from the bathroom and chucking them both in his room and on my bed (ahhh more things to tidy up). Now I try to make the beds, I put the youngest on the floor with some toys whilst I struggle to pull the duvet up onto the bed properly, he is now screaming. My 3 year old keeps telling me he just wants to go downstairs to eat. Finally ready to head down, I turn off the alarm, gather my things, pick up baby, try to open the safety gate with one hand and head down with my other son following behind. Okay now we’re successfully downstairs, its just before 7am. I head to the kitchen & remember in my sleep deprived state last night I’d forgotten to put the dishwasher on (FAIL), dishwasher goes on. Three year old is saying ‘cereal mum’ over and over not listening to my ‘I’m doing it right now’ responses, cereal now on the table & eldest won’t eat it because he wants to play with his spiderman and hulk figures! (Ahhhh!) I grab a brioche bun for the youngest who seems to be demolishing it, I’m worried he’ll finish before I can make him something else which usually means meltdown mode will begin! In a panic I start to cut up some banana. There is a constant meowing and a cat weaving in and out of my legs (oh crap I need to feed the cat!) Youngest is screaming now because he has finished his brioche, onto the banana most of which is thrown at me! I make myself a green tea hoping I’ll find some inner peace at the bottom of my cup! My eldest has now finished his cereal and now wants toast. I pop the bread in the toaster but he doesn’t like the bread I’ve selected and is refusing to have it, eventually he gives in! Not even 8am yet, the boys are playing with their loudest toys! My eldest dismantles his basketball hoop and stand only to use the stand as a weapon for pretend spider hunting (when I say hunting I mean continuously smacking the floor with his pole over and over again, screaming and growling… Good morning neighbours)! I now try to down a slice of toast whilst the boys seem to be occupied… nope! The youngest has caught me and seems far more interested in my toast than his toys! Now they’ve managed to find the baby wipes & proceeded to take them ALL out of the pack. I put them all back, 5 minutes later they have found them again! The youngest has moved onto the telephone and is calling unknown numbers, I hide the phone.
Its finally 8am and the laundry needs sorting. I’m trying to keep the kids entertained, the youngest has a variety of clothes hangers to choose from and my eldest is watching youtube unboxing videos on his tablet. This doesn’t last long. My little one stands up whilst holding onto the lamp stand and decides to start shaking it for reasons I’ll never know. The lamp nearly falls on top of him so I one handedly save the day by catching the lamp, whilst holding a bunch of clothes in my other arm. Laundry done, I’ve spotted my eldest who has found the biscuits. He takes one and shares it with his brother they are in hysterics laughing (I’m reminded by how cute they are!), then they find the rest of the food cupboard! Cupboard contents sprawled across the floor I’m left to tidy it up, thats when my eldest tries coaxing his little brother into doing it again. My living room now looks like a bomb has hit it so I sweep and tidy just to keep my sanity. Biscuits are out again (Why did I sweep!?) Youngest hurts his hand and starts to cry so eldest rubs and kisses it better (again I’m reminded of their cuteness). Youngest wants holding, he is clung onto one of my legs, crying. I pick him up and tears stop immediately, he then pulls at my top because he wants my boob again for the 100th time this morning!
Its 9am & my youngest still wants holding! Eldest wants to race his brother whilst I try to explain he can’t race yet because he is too small, he is still persistent in asking his brother to race! Now my eldest needs to go to the toilet and he wants to go alone. After hearing the toilet flush and tap run indicating he is washing his hands I’m fairly confident everything went smoothly up there. Both boys are now trying to pull down the piles of washing that I just folded whilst screaming and laughing at each other. The tablet that my son wasn’t playing with anymore dies because I forgot to charge it… child is now in meltdown! (But you wasn’t even using it!!) I’m finally able to sit down for a minute, thank the Lord (this feels nice) and again my youngest starts crying, he wants my boob again! Whilst feeding I also have my eldest laying across me. Both boys start fighting for my attention. Again they start playing together so I take this opportunity to make myself another hot drink. I walk back into the living room to find dvds everywhere! (When will this madness end!?) The youngest of the two throws my phone on the floor whilst transforming into a monster & again he goes into meltdown mode… NAP TIME!!!!!
Finally after putting the youngest down for his nap I get the privilege of being able to go to the loo. Upon walking into the bathroom I discover toilet tissue has been thrown everywhere! What a mess! Mum cleans up again… Its not even 10am yet!
To those of you that say parenting isn’t anything like a ‘proper’ job you’re right, its nothing like a proper job – its harder! We don’t get sick days, we don’t get holiday time off, we don’t get to go home for a break and head back the next day, we don’t get weekends off or lunch breaks! We are on duty 24/7, we never switch off!!
Moral of the story – Don’t underestimate the job of a parent!
To all parents out there I salute you!! And to parents with more children than I, you are my idols!! Single parents… How do you do it!? You are all incredible!